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"I Should Put My Children's Needs Before Mine"
Brian Mashburn
July 26, 2015
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Right-Sounding Myths
When I first started having children, I remember thinking: "There is nothing I wouldn't do for them." It was an effortless thought, as natural and unprovoked as breathing.
In a literal sense, it wasn't true, of course. Some of the things that I might do "for them" would end up working "against" them. If I rocked them to sleep every time they cried, I might still be doing so (or some older child version of it). If I did their homework for them, they would be getting grades that did not reflect their actual progress or help them see where they need to focus. If I bought them everything that society says I should, I'd be broke, and they would be spoiled. If I can't bear to let them fail, I'd be lying to them about how life works, and handicapping them in dealing with it.
Knowing and striking this balance takes thoughtfulness, critical contemplation, and lots and lots of grace for yourself as you learn. It is worth your time.
Today, we want to consider a proposition related to this line of thinking. The idea that "I should put my children's needs before my needs."
Remember, believing a myth can mess up your life. And myths that parents operate under concerning their kids give them an inheritance of messes to overcome. So let us critically contemplate this very natural and right sounding statement, affirming any thread of truth in it, and then busting anything that is a myth.
May the truth set us (and our children) free.